i need a camera. i wanna know why.

Everyday we have to go to the Warschauer Strasse U-Bahn Station in order to get to our classes. Usually we take the tram that runs down the street. It has been broken for a few weeks now, so Nick and I have decided to walk to the station instead of taking the bus, which inevitably ends up waiting in traffic far too long for our impatient souls.
Everyday we walk by a photo booth. The strange thing is that maybe 2 or 3 times a week I see a man refilling the photo booth's developer and fixer. This makes me wonder actually how many people stop into the photo booth to warrant such a constant refilling of chemicals. Our friend Javier told us that there are only a few of these old style photo booths left in Berlin and we are lucky enough to live right near one of them. Since we had an extra hour to trapse around today (did you know daylight savings time was actually invented by Benjamin Franklin? the man has quite a resume.) we wanted to experience the magic of this particular one for ourselves. For a mere 2 euros you get 4 photos in the pose of your choice. A deal, I say. As you can see we smuggled the Jenks into the booth for a few choice family photos.

So goes Deutschland... so goes the Union.

Yesterday afternoon a present arrived in our mailbox- our new subscription to Wire. After searching magazine stands and record shops for three weeks in Berlin, we were unable to locate our beloved monthly. We decided it was finally time to cough up the sterling and pony up for a subscription. Good choice. Our first shrink wrapped parcel arrived from their shipping facility in Switzerland. Suzanne has a good strategy, read a little bit each day so as not to run through the whole magazine at once. They sent us two months worth of issues to last until next month. They must know. For those of you keep score at home, we opted for the extra issues in the gift choice since we already have all the Wire Tappers volumes (Thanks Michael Breiner!)


This afternoon we brought our empty bottles back to the market for refund (or Pfand as the German goes). The bottles refund between 8 and 25 cents, depending on a scale we have yet to figure out. You simply feed the bottles into the machine and it prints you out a slip with a total amount. I have been able to figure out that water bottles are worth 25 cents while the beer bottles are worth 8 cents. The soda bottles are somewhere in the middle, but I'm not exactly sure where. The redemption machine figures that out. It's good at it. It speaks German and unlike me, can probably understand its own screen. Anyways, yesterday, we caught a funny article about a crazy Lithuanian recycling/refund scam. Apparently, the steep deposit amounts that Germany places on its bottles not only encourages recycling, but also has developed into a cottage industry for Eastern and Central European counterfeiters. The so called Leergut-Mafia has apparently been manufacturing fake bar codes, placing them on Lithuanian bottles and driving them over the border to redeem at various German supermarkets. German authorities estimate that Leergut-Mafia has cleared over €30,000 !

In other German news, it has been reported that Jurgen Klinsmann has been tapped to head up the US soccer program. Word travels fast to Germany, with the news information service of the U-bahn, the Berliner Fenster, reporting on the latest about 'California Klins.' Will the Jurge be able to field a team that can produce more than an own-goal in the 2010 World Cup? (The US also scored one goal that was legitimately theirs.) Time will tell. In the meanwhile Joachim Löw has quietly moved into head coach job here in Germany. Watching the "Deutschland: Ein Sommermaerchen" film it was easy to see that during this past summer's World Cup, Löw could pretty much see that it would be his team by the fall. Klins to the US, Maradona to Honduras, who will take Sven Goran Eriksson?

Enough football/soccer news. One final thing, during the writing of this post Suzanne has been on the couch with the beagle, watching one of her favorite movies, Reality Bites, in German. It doesn't get much better than that. (Sue adds: I knew it would pay to memorize the whole movie!) I guess tomorrow we try and find "Dumb and Dumber" in German.

Deutschland sucht den Superhund

We found it. It took one month of searching the channels of German television but we found the perfect show. It is called Top Dog and it is amazing. It is the perfect blend of things we love. One, dogs. Lots of dogs and cute ones that do tricks. Two, it is a reality show. It's no Project Runway but it will do. And three, German language. Don't let the title fool you, this show is all in German and nothing but German.
Tonight's episode, from the best I could tell, was the first round/selection show. The dogs came in to show off some tricks and the panel of judges selected which ones would move on to the next round. There were a lot of 'behind the scenes' segments with each contestant's human offering the story of each pooch's training regimen for the competition. Another segment included a how to step by step on the dyeing of poodle hair. Pink and yellow. Those are the colors that I can now dye in.
I like this show because as a reality show, it does not seeem as trashy. Maybe this is because I only understand 15-20% of what they are saying. To me, it is actually a cross between a documentary and a language lesson through the cutest medium in the world - fat little dogs.
The one part that bothers me though, we missed the auditions this season. Mark my words, the Jenks will be taking home that dog shaped trophy in Season 2.

turn on the bright lights.

Tonight Nick, Jenks, myself and our friend Kevin took a
stroll through center Berlin to check out the
Festival of Lights. For 2 weeks all the major monuments and landmarks are lit up and illuminated in funky colors. Here's a photo of the Brandenberg Gate in blues and yellows. Interestingly enough, the TV Tower was not lit up due to an action movie being shot in the adjacent park.
In other news, Nick and I have been feverishly scouring the interweb for jobs. This annoys me for many reasons. Number one, I am in no way a career-oriented person. Really, I just want to work in the back stockroom somewhere and learn German by eavesdropping on other people's conversations. That's pretty much what I do now, only there is no labor attached to it. Just eavesdropping. Also, nothing is more frustrating than looking at a website for a business that had a semi-cool sounding job available, reading the first page and realizing you have no freaking idea what the hell the company does. All there buzzwords float about like marshmallows in ambrosia and it is an immediate turnoff. I don't know JAVA, C++ whatever, or even what the hell IT meant until Nick told me it was a fancy word for working with computers. Then there was one job where they talked about having a "Lean Black Belt" in something. Oh my god, I think I am just going to work retail the rest of my life. This brings me to the next layer of my annoyance: I have no skills. I mean, of course I have skills, like I can make really good overeasy eggs (with the right pan, of course), I know a lot of crap about bands and music, and I can get the Jenks to come to me, sometimes.
I digress.
There is a really cool art installation in the Alexanderplatz subway station. It's some sort of memorial for someone. I haven't researched it further, but it looks damn cool.
Nick is thrilled the Tigers won. What is this "mysterious substance" they speak of on Kenny Rogers' hand? The dude is sketchy. We are going to try to see one of the games live. This could prove difficult seeing how they start at 2 am.
Also, I had a small moment of glory when I got to talk about Sonic Youth in our German class and then our teacher asked me to burn the new album for her. yay!

got a quarter?..go put it in an answering machine.

This morning I woke to the first sight of frost on our windows. Early fall has arrived to Berlin and the leaves are falling. There are some pumpkins around, but they can only be found in plastic trays on the sidewalk of Asian markets. We did, however, have an 'apfelkuchen' today, the closest thing around to an apple pie.
The afternoon weather has been beautiful and temperate, perhaps as a result of global warming/climate change, but who am I to complain? We have dedicated the last two afternoons to cruising the street with the beagle. Yesterday we walked along the Spree and visited a dog park. Wait, did he just say they took the beagle to an off-leash dog park? Well, we went to it, but didn't go in. Jenks had that look of crazy in her eyes and we decided that apologies in broken German might not cover the damage that she could do. We are going to ease into it. Walking the streets without issue was the first goal. We are pretty much there. Dog parks are next.
Today's big achievement: our new bilingual answering machine. How do you leave an out going message on an answering machine in a language you barely know? You google it to find out standard German machine greetings. When that doesn't work you hit the dictionary. A few minutes later Suzanne drafted a script. It was only a German script because she improvised the English one. She's good like that. It took two takes and it was in the can. She is also good like that. It was pretty standard stuff but it just sounds so great in German. And let's give it up for Suzanne. Who among you is able to record a good sounding answering machine greeting in two takes, let alone record a message in a foreign language in that many passes? For the real avid readers of this blog who are just dying to hear the acutal message live on the phone, feel free to email me and I will pass along our home number. A real German greeting only an international long distance call away.

This afternoon we also secured "tickets" for Sonic Youth. They are playing Berlin in December and we figured, "why not?" I say "tickets" because this slip here is our ticket. We bring this to the door on the night of the show and they let us in . It's that easy. No name or location or time or date on the slip, but it does say Sonic Youth on it so we're good. You may wonder, who are these idiots who payed 58euro for what looks like your everyday carbon receipt blank? Us. We are those idiots. In our defense, we know that this is the way it works because last March we saw the Liars and the ticketing/lack of ticketing system was the same. So Sonic Youth in December. December the something-th. Cat Power is also coming in November, but the Chan wants 40 euros each. We are torn and going broke, so we will probably skip the oppurtunity to see her have a public breakdown...Memphis-style.
JENKS UPDATE: We bought a proper tennis ball and rope-toy-thingy at a neighborhood pet store. She likes them. R.I.P. the sock.

Let's Play Sock

Today a new game was invented. it's called "sock". sometimes jenks decides she wants to act like a real dog, instead of the cat-human hybrid she thinks she is most of the time. she prances around the room in an annoying fashion as if to say, "I am bored. pay attention to me now (or give me food)."
so we got her all rialed (spelling? it rhymes with 'dialed') up. she was all crazy-like. i thought, hmmm....let's play a dog game. alas, we have no dog toys. but we do have socks. lots and lots of socks. so i tied one togetha and started waving it in her face. soon thereafter, "sock" was born.

it's like fetch, keep away, and a dental exercise all rolled into one bloody sock. that has been our sunday thus far. also, i bought a sweet wallet made of a German "Smurf" cartoon.

Last night we went to go see a moving picture show. It was called "Deutschland: Ein Sommermaerchen". It's a documentary about the German football/soccer team during the 2006 World Cup. The team came in 3rd place overall after losing in the semifinals to Italy (dirty divers). The documentary was mostly visual for us, seeing how it's in German slang. You could pick up a lot from the body language. And I didn't mind the shower locker room scenes. No, but seriously, it was really cool and moving. It was amazing to see how the whole country fully embraced the team and the tournament. It was a huge success that Germany made it that far. The titled even translates to "Germany: A Summer Fairytale". People are still talking about how well they did.

It made me think about how when the USA finishes 3rd in a worldwide sporting event everyone says the team sucked, and usually only a small percentage even cared to begin with.
I don't know if the movie will come out in the US, but it is really worth checking out if you like that sorta thing.
i now have a date with flash cards.
-sue

Below a first grade reading level.

We knew it. It was only a matter of time. Yesterday the workers came to remove the spray paint and graffiti that had found its way onto the walls of the building across the courtyard from our flat. A few weeks ago we saw a special on NDR, the national station, about how a group of workers had developed paints to deter graffiti artists. They worked under the auspices of the BGV, the U-Bahn people, to make graffiti non-permanent. They use paints that don't absorb the spray paint, they also developed removal aides that are far beyond your standard paint thinner. Anyways, with these technologies in hand, the workers descended on the plaza next to our home. They scrubbed benches, walls, the playground and the stone steps. They washed and repainted doors of the adjacent building. We took a bet, how long would these clean and inviting surfaces last? Any guesses? Well, if you guessed less than 24hrs. then you are correct! Some of the Berlin graffiti is very well worth it. Such as this bit Sue saw in the Volkspark the other day. But the graffiti work on our neighboring building, if I could call it that, is unfocused. The tags are not creative, and the spray paint is runny. C'mon now, is this your first attempt graffiti? Please, we need better work here.





This morning we took the Lizard out for a stroll through our neighborhood. She likes the air and usually stops every 10 meters or so to smell around (look at me, I am using metric, my sister, who wrote her undergrad thesis on it, would be proud). We found a Saturday morning market that has farm fresh vegetables, cheeses and meats. The steak sandwiches were not really as advertised, seing as they were pork. And, the guy who sold them to us harrassed us about the Jenks' Gentle Leader being a muzzle. The first thing it says on the website is that it not a muzzle! They even gave us a pin that says "This is NOT a muzzle." I guess this is something I need to learn how to say in German, sooner rather than later.

This afternoon Sue made some flashcards to help with learning articles and vocabulary in German. Ok, so they are mainly for me, seeing as she is much better at German, but I'll say they are for us. Its the basics, but at least its somewhere to start. I would say that I feel like a four year old but I saw a one on the train other day with a vocabulary that put mine to shame. Ouch.

reminds me of Chicago. the band, not the city.

Nick waited for his residence permit for 4 hours this afternoon. We're not sure what paper he was given, but it doesn't seem like a residence permit. Yes, we are idiots. Who waits 4 hours for something and at the end still doesn't know what it is? We must consult our peeps at the Neue Schule. He does have an appointment to wait for an unspecified amount of time at the same office on December 28th. It seems he is paying his dues to German culture. It's actually worse than the DMV.

Last night we saw Germany play Slovakia in a Euro 2008 qualifying match. In case Crandall reads this, I will not reveal the score. It was pretty freaky when during halftime they showed a burning building in NYC. Since we don't understand, much we were confused. The only words we new were plane, building and then something about 9-11. We googled and found out it was Cory Lidle's plane. That's shitty.

On a more uplifting note, we took Jenks to the Volkspark Friedrichshain, or as we say in our best German accent- da peoplez paark.





Taco seasoning here leaves something to be desired. Also, 100 index cards cost 2.50 euro. I found that to be a bit much. and our vacuum cleaner sucks. it's no match for jenks' female dog pattern baldness.

but the beer is cheap and good. that's all that matters.

Berlin Bling.

Jenks is officially Berlin blinging. I had to wait quite a while for this piece of ice. Also, I have no idea what the lady at the Finanzamt was saying to me. Apparently, you have to pay a dog tax, but I don't know when such a tax must be paid. I figure if it's important enough they will just come after me.

After a frustrating phone call with the German helpline at "Alice", we finally have internet. They tried to convince me our mac modem was broken. hmm.. but, this is a joyous day. i can now begin my lurid love affair with BitTorrent once again.

Nick and I saw Science of Sleep last night. Gael, if you are listening, I love you.

We had another karaoke experience this weekend.

Nick has been scouring record stores for the new Sean Lennon album. The question is, is there a different foreign release date, or does no one care? I laugh.

One week of German classes have come and gone and we still can't say a goddamn thing! no, that's a lie. we can say a few things...

Please, no one speak about the Yankees dismal performance in the division series. I'm so pissed I didn't even get to watch them. One day I woke up and Nick told me they were out.

An interesting note on German/American reciprocity. Apparently someone who lives in Arkansas, Alabama or Kansas can get a German driver's licence with no problem. However, someone from Massachusetts, Vermont, New York or New Jersey cannot do such a thing. We must take a freaking exam and road test in order to get one. So I guess Alabama has more Autobahn-istic traits than NJ.

Don't leave me hanging on like a jo-jo.

Much has happened in the past few days, but because we don't have internet in our apartment yet (it's coming next monday!) we have been remiss in our blogging. i know our legion of blogfans are saddened by this, but that's the way it must be.

on friday we hung out with our realtor/new friend thorsten. he had a rocking karaoke party at his apartment. it was amazing, to say the least. there's nothing quite like singing cheesy love songs in english with germans. unfortunately, we left the camera at home. :(

above is a photo of jenks chillin' in our partly furnished apartment. the dog loves to patrol the patio! it is coming along pretty well. Watch out, our apartment could be featured in the next IKEA flyer. it's a good thing i watched a shit ton of discovery channel/travel channel interior decorating shows in NJ before we came. Damn right i can "flip that house"!

We bought a non-luxorious tv and dvd player the other day. We came home and plugged it into the preexisting cable socket. much to our surprise and excitement the cable is already hooked up! One less phone call/email in shitty Ganglish (German/English) we have to make. The only crappy thing is we don’t get any sports channels. With the MLB playoffs coming up this could be a problem. We must remedy this at once!

We tried to install a free refrigerator from our friends today. Some crackling and smoke later we realized it was broken. our friends said to put it out on the street... and so we did. much like when we were cleaning house in Vermont, we put everything we didn’t want on the side of the road. thing work the same way here. a very lucky person will get a free broken refrigerator! (note: at the time of this blogging the fridge is already disparu.)

In other homemaker news, we had to put up curtain rods. This seems like a relatively easy task, right? Haha, not so. It appears our entire apartment interior is concrete except for a very small part. This makes for fancy green sparks and broken drill bits. Let’s just say, we must buy spackle sooner than expected.

It has been an adventure finding the German equivalent to American stores. For instance Real is Kmart and Bauhaus is Home Depot, which makes me laugh because all I can think of is the band on
4AD.

our classes start tomorrow. never before have we been so excited for school. and on an even more exciting note, now we have something to do with our days! At least 3 hours of them. it is strange being unemployed. As soon as we get the interweb back we are going to try our luck at online entrepreneurship. We’re thinking some sort of peanut butter importation service.

I cry a single tear everytime we walk by a vespa, and that happens a lot. Damn that crasher girl!

we have been training jenks not to bark in the apartment. luckily we know a little about soundproofing (the video pigeon basement comes to mind...) so we put her in a "room within a room". To get to know our Bezirk better we take a nightly stroll down a different side street. The lizard enjoys this, although some dogs get a little “too friendly”. One incident in particular comes to mind. I wanted to tell that dog, she’s not that easy! At least buy her dinner and a few drinks first!

Also Jenks has more food than us. This is sad.